Let's just have a good cry

*This was written in 2018… our particularly awful year.*

Do you ever just have a day? You know, the kind where you just say, "Oh my. I've had quite a day."? The kind where you aren't as strong as you wish you were and you forget to lean on God and feel sad and anxious instead? I really, really hate those days. They're the dark days, the evil days, the anxiety and worry filled days. They're not fun.

And sometimes, on those days, you just need to have a good cry.

Lately, I've had more of those days than I'd like to admit and they're really pretty awful. I tend to chip at my kids and get offended way too easily. I have a hard time focusing on those days and find myself wandering off into my sad or anxious thoughts and it's hard to come back.

Recently, during one of those particularly sad days, as we were packing up to leave yet another home we had been staying in, my husband mentioned that we should start cleaning up and packing since we had to leave in the morning. I said, "I don't want to." He asked what I wanted to do instead and I said, "Honestly, I just want to lay on the floor and cry." "What?" "I said I just want to lay on the floor and cry." And my sweet husband replied, "Okay." "What?" "I said 'Okay.' Let's lay on the floor and cry." So we both climbed off the couches and laid on the floor in each others' arms and I cried and cried.

I realized that sometimes life is really hard. Sometimes we just can’t do it. Sometimes a good cry is in order. And it’s okay. It’s okay because in our weakness, Christ’s strength is shown. It’s okay because even Jesus wept. It’s okay because on those dark and lonely days, God is there with us… holding us, loving us, comforting us, and encouraging us.