War and Marriage: A series for wives Part 3

This week we're diving into the first part of the armor of God which is the belt of truth. For those who haven't been with us so far, we're talking about the spiritual battle taking place over our marriages and I highly suggest checking out Parts 1 (Here) and 2 (Here).

We'll start off by looking at the belt that this scripture is referring to. Roman soldiers wore a belt as sort of the 'anchor' for their armor. The belt was used to hold up their long robes so they could run and fight and was most likely the first piece of armor they would have put on. Also, they wore the belt even when not in battle. The belt had a spot for them to keep their sword and metal strips in the front to protect their... uh... manhood. (Hence the phrase "gird your loins with the belt of truth".) So the belt was a really important piece and like I mentioned, kind of a staple for them.

In marriage, truth is vital. We know it's important to be honest with our spouse but we're going to be talking about more than that. We're going to be looking at GOD'S truth for our marriages. It's simple but without it, we don't stand a chance. I know it can be really hard to filter the lies of the enemy in marriage so let's break down some of the ways we can put on the truth as wives.

The first thing is to realize that truth and facts are different. Facts are subject to change. Truth is not. For example, I can be sick today but tomorrow I can be well. The fact is that I'm sick today. That fact might not be the same tomorrow. The TRUTH is that God is healer. That will be the same tomorrow. I can't change that. It's constant and unchanging and unaffected by the facts. The fact might be that you have been a nagging or rude wife. The TRUTH is that God created you for good works which he set out before you. Here's the tricky part though... the enemy will use those facts to tell lies. The facts are neutral and the enemy will always use them to bend your mind HIS way. If the fact is that you've been a nagging, rude wife, the enemy will tell you that you're worthless, that you can't change, that it's your husband's fault you act that way, that it's the kids fault, that you're justified in it, that you're undesirable because of it, that your husband won't want you because of it, that your marriage won't be better because of it... You get the picture. It's all doom and gloom. It's all hopeless. It's all negative.

When you have that SAME fact that you've been nagging and rude and look at it through the TRUTH of God, it starts to look a whole lot different. God says, I have cast your sins as far as the east is from the west, go and sin no more, I have made you new, I make beauty from ashes, I can speak life into dry bones, marriage is from me, I am your healer, you can hope in me, trust in me, you are clothed in my righteousness, you are forgiven. It's all hopeful. It's all loving. It's all good.

When you don't know if you're believing the truth or a lie, just start looking at the fingerprints. The fingerprints of the enemy are doom, gloom, and destruction. The fingerprints of God are love, forgiveness, and hope. The enemy will lie about you and your value and also about your husband and his value. It's a messy thing when we start listening to him. When we do, we start believing his lies and speaking them out. The Bible talks a lot about the power of the tongue (the tongue has the POWER of life and death). When we start speaking the death stuff with our powerful tongue, it's not such a great situation. But when we start speaking out the TRUTH with that powerful tongue, it's amazing what can happen. The truth empowers both us and our husbands. It gives us hope and helps us remember we were created for more than what the enemy has been telling us. It reminds us that our value is based on God, not on what we do, and that allows us to live in freedom, not in bondage.

I want to encourage you to explore the lies you have been believing about your marriage. Have you been believing that your husband's pornography addiction means you are unattractive and worthless? LIE. Have you been believing that your sharp tongue or lazy tendencies can't be helped? LIE. Do you believe that you married the wrong person? LIE. Do you believe that your problems are too big for God to help? LIES! Take some quiet time in your prayer time and ask God to search your heart and reveal to you what lies you have been believing. I want you to write them down and counter them with the truth of what GOD says about each of those things. Not facts, just truth. Incorporate that into your prayer time every day and see what starts to happen as those mental strongholds start to crumble. "Take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5.

So belt up, ladies! Put on the first piece of your armor every morning and wear it all day long. You got this.

We're so in love.

We're so in love.

War and Marriage: A series for wives Part 2

I think one of the biggest lies our enemy tells us is that we’re helpless; that our marriages, our husbands, and even ourselves, cannot change. It’s not true. It just isn’t. God talks all OVER the Bible about people changing. Our God is the God of hope and if you’ve been believing there is no hope for your marriage, I want you to ditch that idea RIGHT NOW. Right now. Stop thinking that. Our hope is in God and he does not fail. If the enemy can get us to believe that victory is impossible, he will render us completely ineffective. It’s not that we won’t be filled with power from the Holy Spirit, but instead that we won’t use that power. We won’t wield the sword if we believe it isn’t strong enough to kill the serpent.

Another problem is that sometimes we don’t know what sword to use to fight the battle with. We don’t know how to overcome the attacks of the enemy on our marriage. I’ve been there more than I’d like to admit. I’ve tried to fix my husband more than a handful of times and it doesn’t usually go over so well. The truth is, marriage is spiritual and we can’t fix something spiritual if we’re operating in the flesh. THANKFULLY, God, in his perfect, most wonderful goodness, has given us a slew of powerful, effective, beautiful, spiritual tools that can overcome the attacks of the enemy. And thankfully, they don’t depend on our own strength, intelligence, or ability.

When I think about the tools we have in this war called marriage, I can come up with a HUGE list of things God has told us in the Bible. Like, SO MANY TOOLS. It’s pretty sweet. But for the most concise, easy-to-remember list, I’ve gotta go back to Ephesians 6. In Ephesians, Paul tells us to put on the full armor of God and it’s intense. The armor consists of the following: the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shoes that are the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God. He then reminds us to pray on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. Each week we are going to be talking about a different part of the armor of God and how it directly applies to our marriage. We are going to see what the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace means for you when it comes to your marriage. We aren’t going to stand idly by and watch marriages fail and crumble before our eyes. Not if we have anything to do with it. We aren’t going to let sin rip our hearts to shreds or let the enemy’s lies destroy us and the men we love. We aren’t going to see another generation of children scarred by the pain of divorce.

Nope. Not gonna happen.

We will stand tall and FIGHT for our marriages. We will fight for our unsaved husbands. We will fight for the men so bogged down by burden that they barely crack a smile anymore. We will fight for our husbands trapped in addictive cycles with pornography, alcohol, or gambling. We will fight for the men who are so hurt they can’t pray for themselves. We will fight because we are the daughters of the most high God and he has showered us with favor and love. We will lift up our swords and sound our battle cry and say NO MORE. The enemy won’t have my marriage and he won’t have yours. My marriage is for God and my purpose is to bring glory to the God who has saved me. And nothing will get in my way. Let’s fight.